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  • Writer's pictureBecks

Surviving the holidays; for HSPs & people pleasers

Do you need decompression time after being around people?

Do you feel anxious or overloaded in social settings or end up feeling depleted as you absorb the emotions of others around you?


Research suggests that somewhere around 30 per cent of people are ‘highly sensitive people’ (or HSPs), so there’s every chance that either you are one or you know one! And if you are; you might just find that anxiety, overwhelm and depletion feels all too familiar (if not worse) around the holiday season. 


What is an HSP?


It’s not a diagnosis or disorder.; It is a set of character/personality traits. Your brain responds more strongly to social and emotional cues than the brains of your less sensitive family and friends. You might find yourself people pleasing; putting the needs of others above your own and being hyperaware to others moods. 


This can be be draining at the best of times if you don’t know how to navigate these traits - so it stands to reason that over the holiday/Christmas season (as you find yourself surrounded by people, screaming kids, noisy office banter, Christmas music on repeat and the general dread of a never-ending shopping and to-do list) you might just find yourself frazzled, overstimulated and drained to below ‘E’.


How can you thrive as an HSP/empath/people pleaser over the holidays?


Work on your boundaries 

You will need to practise distinguishing between emotions that are yours and emotions that belong to others. Ask yourself; ‘Is this feeling mine?’ If not, say: ‘This feeling does not belong to me. I do not need to fix this feeling or figure it out. I allow it to flow over me.’ Remind yourself it isn’t your job to meet everyone else needs at this time of year at the expense of your own sanity. Nor are others emotions your responsibility. 


Create a decompression routine: 

Before the sensory overload and overwhelm threatening to make you want to pull your hair out; take a few minutes (several times a day) to decompress. Creating a calming ritual where you disentangle yourself from the chaos and overwhelm of the holidays might be as simple as taking ten deep breaths every time you go to the kitchen or hiding away in the bathroom for 2 minutes to dunk your face in cold water.  Then, when the guest are gone or your day is coming to an end, make yourself a cup of herbal tea to enjoy on your own. Quietly. Mindfully. Maybe even in the shower with only candles going to reset your senses;  like I do!


Regulate your nervous system

As an HSP, people pleaser or someone who experiences anxiety you may often find yourself in fight/flight/freeze or fawn mode. You can use tools like diaphragmatic breathing and special vagus nerve exercise to rewire your nervous system for calm - why not enroll in my free 14 day course full of these tools here



If you're ready to dive deeper - then these courses are ideal for you:


You feel things deeply, read others emotions & get sensory overload - being an empath or a highly sensitive person can be draining - but it doesn't have to be. In this course you'll learn how to thrive as an HSP/empath and use these traits to your benefit.





A masterclass in learning to state your needs, set boundaries, deal with pushback and protect your precious energy.

Learn a step by step process to set boundaries with people in your life AND with yourself.



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